hey sweety,
you dun need to apologise, for anything!!!! I totally understand why your replies are coming late! I go through the same phase, more often than not, when I'm in delhi. So, it's cool buddy!
First thing's first...how are you??? i bet the semester is ending and work pressure is double. I hope you ain't pushing urself hard and taking care of urself properly. If you need any help or anything, just remember I'm simply a msg away!
Thanks for your understanding and support. ||BIG HUG||. Love you so much! Actually hun, i finally figured out why this has been lingering for so long!!! To be frank, I always wanted everyone to like me! So, when people used to ambush me behind my back, I'd get hurt! But, now I have realised that it's okay if some people hate you. I mean, there is no shortcut to success but there is a sure way to failure and that is, if you try to please everyone! Be it my teachers, cousins, colleagues, i always wanted to be accepted and appreciated! Now I feel, the appreciation is not worth it, when it comes from the wrong kind or from people who do not accept who you are!. Besides, one doesn't want to be accepted by the wrong kind.
You know manpreet, reputation is very over rated, and character under-rated! I had read somewhere, "a good character is worth more than a good reputation"! I understand it's importance now. I don't want to have a good reputation at the cost of my character. At the end of the day, when I can face myself and appreciate myself for who I am, i'd rather have that! Just think, a person with a lot of fame, but no character, no sense of right/wrong, can that person ever face his trueself? he'll be living in an illusion all his life! Isn't that sad? I wouldn't want that ever!
And truth is, when you're being called a 'bitch' for no apparent reason or justification, then it's a "compliment in disguise"! It means you're successful. Yup! as wicked as this sounds, but it's the angelic truth! When people cannot be like x or y, isn't it easier to ambush them? "Grapes are sour", and that's why grapevine seems sweet...;-) So, from now on every time I'm labelled "mastermind" I'll smile and say "Thanks pea- brained"..I mean clearly, if you had enough brains, you would have figured out my "master plan" before i executed it..huh????
Just 5 more months and them I'm off. But techniqually its 150(+/-) days! Then these characters, will no longer exist in my life-book. And life's long! I'll meet so many people that at the end, the verdict of some petite loosers won't even matter. I don't need a certificate from them to prove myself. Nor, I'll change myself to be like them.
I know these 150days would be really hard, esp when I'm alone but I think, nope i know, I'll survive, you know why? 'cause I have my support system.People who genuinely care for me, appreciate me and accept me the way I'm. People who love my vices and me alike! people who understand that my negativities are a part of me and no one is perfect!! People who need no justification from me. People who can spell out each word exactly the way I think. People like YOU, SURANGAMA, Mom, My family and a rabbit named ZOOZOO.
Thank you so much for inspiring me, loving me unconditionally and being there for me, regardless of time, place and circumstances,and you are right..they can love me or hate me but surely they cannot ignore me! it makes me feel like a celeb!
I love you loads..
HUGs & Kisses
Sugana.
